Do You Know Your Family's Favorites?
by Charlotte Siems
Gift-giving occasions come around pretty often at our house, with twelve children, their three spouses (soon to be four) and, in the last year and a half, three grandchildren. Birthdays and holidays are a chance to show love and appreciation to the recipient, but gifts from garage sales and thrift stores are fair game. Quantity counts for birthdays, and the younger children especially like to give small gifts like candy. Used pencils and pennies taped in homemade cards are also popular with the little siblings.
Our traditions include birthday cereal chosen by the special person. There are usually a couple of kinds, and yes, they are all rarely purchased junk cereal like Marshmallow Maties or Cap’n Crunch. More than once we have made a late-night run to the grocery store when I forgot the birthday cereal.
When the children were mostly young we used to gather on our king-sized bed in the morning to open presents. As everyone grew and more persons were added to the family, whether by birth or marriage, we moved this ritual to the den. Assorted packages and gift bags are stacked up on the coffee table and opened with everyone present. Then a secret signal is given and the usual good-natured free-for-all wrestling match takes the birthday person down, ending up with “a pinch to grow an inch.” The day is spent in various ways depending on whether it’s a party year. We’ve had some pretty creative and fun themes for birthday parties and I’ll share some of those in coming articles.
Due to the sheer volume of people and advanced age (mine), it’s nearly impossible to remember who likes what kind of cereal or candy or other items. Many years ago I designed a form on the computer called “Family Favorites.” It used to be paper forms kept in a home management notebook. Times have changed and now the lists are kept in a folder in the Awesome Notes app on Mom’s iPhone.
When it is time for a birthday or Christmas, anyone can check the page for a family member and see what their favorites are. These are the categories that we use:
- Favorite Restaurants (this is handy for gift cards or plans for a birthday meal)
- Favorite Candy (helps us choose small gifts or Finals Survival Kit items for the ones in college)
- Favorite Home-Cooked Meal (useful for times when I want to especially encourage a child, not just for birthdays)
- Favorite Cereal
- Favorite Colors
- Favorite Snacks (nice to plan for when grown children are going to be in for the weekend)
Gifts are always nice, but gifts that are your special favorites are even better. We update the lists about once a year as tastes change, children get older or someone gets engaged.
Edith Schaeffer said “Somebody has to get up early, stay up late, do more than the others, if the human garden is to be a thing of beauty.” It’s work to buy gifts, decorate a table, plan in advance for a special dessert or keep track of who likes what. But that work translates into caring for persons and helping them feel valued in the family. A Family Favorites list is a practical tool to keep track of special preferences so that you can personalize an occasion without too much strain on a busy Mom’s brain.
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Do you have a favorite birthday tradition? Post a comment and tell us about it!
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 Charlotte Siems has studied home management for over 30 years. She believes that Home should always be a warm, welcoming, Lovely Place to shelter and strengthen loved ones for their tasks out in the world. While building a homey home on a tight budget and making memories with holiday traditions, she has fostered a love of learning in her children and maintained a healthy marriage. She lives in Oklahoma with her family, where she still homeschools the youngest six of her twelve children. |
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