Keys to Real-Life Goal-Setting for Weight Loss
“Set goals.” “Make a New Year’s Resolution.” “Make your goals huge so you’ll have the passion to aim for them.”Sound familiar? We’ve all heard the goal-setting gurus proclaim different methods to set goals and reach them but so many of us have failed with their methods that we tend to give up and think, “what’s the use?” I’ve felt that way before, yet I used goals to lose over 100 pounds.
At times I felt almost embarrassed that my goal-setting methods didn’t fit the prescribed form. I knew that if I set a goal of losing 100 pounds I would give up before I started. That took too much emotional energy, especially as a More to Lose person. Deep down I had a dream of losing 100 pounds. But that couldn’t be the star I aimed for when I weighed 258 pounds.
Instead I told myself “the next decade of pounds.” In other words, when I weighed 258, I wanted to get into the 240’s. Next the 230’s. I did that all the way down.
In looking back, I can now see why it worked for me. That’s all the belief I had at the time.
To start out I couldn’t even admit to myself that I wanted to lose 100 pounds. It was too painful, too overwhelming and too shameful (not true, but that’s how I thought). I didn’t even tell anyone outside of my immediate family that I was beginning an exercise program. I felt private about it and didn’t want to share my hopes.
I now believe that helped me stay focused. When we share our excitement and breathlessly outline our plans to other people, we get the same physical, emotional release and good feelings as if we’d already done the thing we’re planning. Our brain can’t tell the difference between us talking about it a lot and doing it.
We lose energy and drive. We can even become addicted to the planning and sharing stage and never move on to the DOING stage.
So here are two keys to help you with your weight loss goals in 2014:
1) Set smaller goals along the way. Set goals that you truly believe you can reach. Make a plan to get to the smaller goal and work the plan. Then move the goal line a little further down the field as you go along.
2) Stay quiet about it. That doesn’t mean you don’t talk about your goals or share what you’re doing. Choose wisely where you share it. Your spouse, a friend or two and the T-Tapp forum are good places to share. Just don’t disperse all of your energy and focus by excitedly talking about what you’re going to do with everyone you meet and go home satisfied.
If you’ve been avoiding the goal-setting scene because it seems pointless or overwhelming, try scaling back. It will remove the overwhelm. And you will feel the exhilaration and rush of reaching a goal over and over instead of just at the end of a long road. Maybe you’ll even get addicted to the rush of success.
Reaching my dream goal of losing over 100 pounds was really the accumulation of reaching lots of smaller goals. Try taking a baby step towards a doable goal, and be sure to celebrate when you reach it. Keep your eye on the closer prize, and before you know it you’ll be in the home stretch to your final goal.
Thank you for addressing the “make public” all your dreamy goals idea.
I feel the same way as you described but have been doubting myself thinking I was just too prideful to share it in that way.
No one needs to exploit themselves.
Thank you for your wise words and your example to boot!
I know that some people teach that you should share your goals in public, but it didn’t feel right for me and this is why. I’m glad it resonated with you!
Thank you for those wise words. I can relate to the idea of being satisfied with the planning without actually doing anything. I LOVE to plan and make goals. It’s a hobby. But I need to take this to heart and get moving.
I’ve also heard it said that goals have a snowball effect. Once you have success in one area, you tend to see success in other areas. I need to remember that and not try to get my whole life planned out before starting on accomplishing something. Once I have success in one area, other areas will see success, as well.
On another note, when I was 15, I had a little cancer episode and decided to do calesthenics for 30 minutes a day in my bedroom. I just wanted to be healthier. By the end of the school year, about 5 months later, I was actually buffer than I had been. I didn’t continue the habit, but I’d like to harness that memory this year to remind me that I am making progress when I take those baby steps toward my goals.
I think it’s true that success in one area snowballs into success in other areas. Studies have proven that people succeed more when they start small. Little victories add up!
Hi Charlotte, In 2013 I found out about T Tapp and your blog I want to thank you for being such a blessing to me and God Bless you and your family for 2014.
Thank you so much, Helen! Best wishes to you and your family on an amazing 2014!
Charlotte, I love the concept of mini, do-able goals (remember a goal is just a dream with a date on it). You are right they do seem more attainable. I find I can’t think more than 30 days ahead for my goals so I try to do something I can accomplish in the next 30 days. However, I often forget how much life gets in the way.
I’m also another one who often enjoys the planning and meditating on the goal more than actually doing the work to attain it.
My word for 2014 is FINISH. I want to finish my goals this year – especially the mini ones.
Thanks for the encouragement!!
Theresa 😎
Love your “word” for the year! Best wishes on your goals journey!
Honestly, I almost didn’t read this post when I saw the word “Goals.” I confess to being a procrastinator, maybe even *lazy,* =:o yet a bit of a perfectionist. When I set goals as the ‘experts’ recommend, I almost NEVER meet them. It’s gotten to the point that I completely avoid setting goals of any kind, and if I do, I certainly never tell anyone. Deadlines make me freeze up, and a specific goal always makes me feel like a failure. Frankly, that’s why I’ve never entered any of the T-Tapp contests or challenges! I’ve appreciated the program so much, and don’t want to jinx it by putting on too much pressure. Thanks for posting a more calm and relaxed approach. Right now, I’m mostly sticking with goals that can be accomplished today. I can’t even imagine a five-year goal. It’s just too overwhelming.
I know what you mean! I have enough stress and “have to’s” in my life without adding pressure with hard goals! You’re on the right track keeping it doable!
The idea of keeping your goals quieter makes so much sense to me right now. I always thought yelling people would help keep me accountable, but it didn’t prove to be so! Just more guilt, more shame that I “can’t stick to anything.” That’s counterproductive…
I’m gaining courage to face reality quietly & confidently & change for the better this year!
Love this! Your quiet confidence and courage will see you through!
How do I get started with this weight loss goal?
Tracey, I started with doing T-Tapp workouts at least four times a week. The inch loss was motivating. Eventually I was ready to change my eating. Plexus can help with that. It was just important for me not to overwhelm myself with total life change all in one week, lol.
Charlotte, reading this was an aha moment for me! Really huge AHA moment! The simple insight of the planning and sharing being the satisfaction of actually doing really helped me to understand why I wasn’t reaching my goals in weight loss, homeschooling, and faith. I would get so excited about something new and run and share with everyone what my plans were. Shame would soon follow though…..my goals being unmet before I started. I could not figure out why this always happened to me. I quit sharing my elaborate plans with others but still had them privately without success too. I’m a mess! Thanks to your insight I see why….too much planning and not enough doing. So now, a simple doable goal and finishing with success in a few areas of my life will be my focus for 2015 . Thank you and God Bless !