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Value This Life

Value This Life

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How to Stop Feeling Busy All the Time

Being busy is almost a badge of honor these days. It’s fashionable to complain about it on social media, and talk about it with a loud sigh while standing in line with a friend. Believe me, I was skilled in blaming lots of stress on being busy. But after many years of wearing the “busy badge,” I’ve been working on how to stop feeling busy all the time.

I finally realized that the thought of “I’m so busy” is not serving me. Busyness is just a feeling, and it’s created by sentences in our mind. I love that word: sentences. It strips away the power of those feelings and exposes it for what it is: sentences we are telling ourselves. We can use the sentences to justify lack of self-care, being late, procrastination, and all manner of undesirable behavior. Maybe part of it is competition in our mind with other people: “I’m busier than them.”

The thing is, we are responsible for our thoughts and emotions. We are choosing to feel busy.

Thoughts + Feelings = State of Mind.

Yes, there’s a lot to do and many of us have numerous responsibilities. I’m not denying that there are hard circumstances and heavy loads. But here’s the first step in how to stop feeling busy all the time:

Stop telling yourself

I had to stop telling myself “I’m so busy.”

Telling myself those sentences and making them my story just made me feel overwhelmed and stressed. It kept me focused on “I can’t” and “this is too hard.”

The truth is….I have plenty of time to get everything done….that matters.

Become aware of those words “I’m so busy” and replace them with “I have plenty of time to get everything done that matters.” Try that on for size–how does it feel? You might feel stress drain away, and you just might feel a little silly for having gotten so overwhelmed.

REplace words

Here’s another tip for the sentences in your brain: Replace “I HAVE to do” with:

“I’m excited to do”

or

“I get to do”

or

“I WANT to do.”

Think about doing the things you do because it matters. Because you want to be the kind of person who does those things. It’s just what you do, because it’s who you are.

Newsflash: you don’t necessarily have to LIKE everything you do that matters. It’s a great opportunity to build character and work ethic.

Re-Think Your List

Re-think “the stuff I gotta do.” Write a list of all you do, then think about what REALLY matters. How much time do you spend doing things that don’t matter? Reclaim a portion of that time for what does matter. Start by taking a look at the screen time spent on your mobile devices. Stunning, isn’t it? What could you get done if you cut that screen time in half?

Remind yourself: “I am creating this stress and overwhelm by my thoughts. I can choose different thoughts.” We can choose to feel busy and stressed and overwhelmed….or not. Thoughts create feelings, so go backwards and change the thoughts.

Let’s admit that sometimes we want to wallow in self-pity and have a good overwhelm. Maybe deep down we hope someone will rescue us or justify our meltdown. Is that really who we want to be?

Do you want to be a peaceful person with moments of frustration or a frustrated person with peaceful moments?

I choose to reclaim my agenda and my time, and to do things because they matter. I choose more solid boundaries around how I spend my time, and a solid awareness of my thoughts. Life will never be perfect, but I choose to be a peaceful person with fleeting moments of frustration.

Lest you think I’m amazing, let me tell you that I work on this every day. It’s a constant retraining of my thinking but it’s getting there. And when I’m not there, I forgive myself. And then forgive myself when I don’t forgive myself!

Who’s with me? Let’s stop feeling busy all the time!

 

 

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About Charlotte

I'm a grateful wife & mom of 12 amazing persons. I love to inspire & teach busy women to find beauty in everyday life by caring for themselves, creating comfortable homes with their families and living out ordinary days with grace and gratitude. I'd love to encourage YOU!

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Kari H. says

    October 18, 2019 at 6:12 pm

    Oh my goodness, what a WONDERFUL post! Thank you from the bottom of my heart, this is a game-changer for me.

    Reply

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I'm a grateful wife & mom of 12 amazing persons. I love to inspire & teach busy women to find beauty in everyday life by caring for themselves, creating comfortable homes with their families and living out ordinary days with grace and gratitude. I'd love to encourage YOU! Read More…

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valuethislife

valuethislife
Have you ever procrastinated about doing something Have you ever procrastinated about doing something, with thoughts of dread and overwhelm?😬And then done the thing,  finding that it was easier and faster to get done than you thought it would be?🥴Yeah, me too. Note to self: The dreading and putting off costs a whole lot more emotional energy than just doing the thing. 😊
In our busy ordinary lives there is a tendency to In our busy ordinary lives there is a tendency to get by with the barebones of running the household—but we skip the joy, comfort and encouragement part.   We trade an artful arrangement of beautiful things on the coffee table for a stack of newspapers and mail. The TV takes the place of a board game. Irritation with our family flavors our speech.   Sometimes this happens so slowly that we barely notice it, and then one day we realize that our home life is out of sorts.  With that realization comes the choice to fix those little things. Tidy up the clutter, get the laundry caught up, read aloud to children, and set a pretty table for an ordinary supper.  Look around your home with fresh eyes to see if it needs a reset. Even 20 minutes of tidying can make an amazing difference.❤️
Unexpected October ice storm in Oklahoma. Power ha Unexpected October ice storm in Oklahoma. Power has been out for 2+ days, grateful for a generator and hot water. I figured out that complaining doesn’t make electricity come back on. 😊
Always wanted a “mother’s ring” with birthst Always wanted a “mother’s ring” with birthstones of our children but we never found a design with 12 stones. 💍 It was a forgotten wish until I received this bracelet as a sweet gift. I can rattle off their birthdates like a boss but sometimes the size of our family still surprises me. It grew one baby at a time and I grew along with them, like all mothers do. There’s no rewind button, and we can’t go back and have a do-over. But we can be grateful during EVERY season for what we have, and I am!❤️
“They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their “They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength.” Not “they that complaineth much” or “they that talk about their issues all day long.” I’m guessing that “not waiting” means sucking the life out of strength instead of renewing it. But waiting can begin in this very moment. 
•
(pic from my kitchen window)😊
Sometimes it’s a struggle getting started on a t Sometimes it’s a struggle getting started on a task, but we all love how it feels when the task is done. Maybe it would help to think about how good the result will feel before we start!
Yeah, I had to run to the store to get eggs before Yeah, I had to run to the store to get eggs before 14yo could mix up cookie dough. 
👉🏻Note to self:
Don’t wait until it’s time to do a task to check whether you have what you need to do it. Realizing you’re short on supplies or information at the last minute costs time and causes stress! Knowing that you’re prepared eases the pain of getting started. Put “check for ingredients” on your to-do list!
How much life do we waste worrying and fretting an How much life do we waste worrying and fretting and dreading....when the thing we’re upset about IS GOING TO GET DONE?! It’s going to happen, it’s all going to work out, and we probably won’t even remember it by next week. Sometimes it helps to remember that!💕
We bought a house built in the 80’s and have bee We bought a house built in the 80’s and have been doing that fixer upper thing. Sorry for the blurry “before” but just think “black hole” and you’ll get the idea.😂 Amazing what paint and decor can do for a space. Sold the old mantel on FB Marketplace for $60 and bought the unfinished new one for $45. Found the print in my garage, lol. Mirror from Hobby Lobby. Sorta reminds me of my life pre-Jesus. Dark to light. Old to new. Same basic human, transformed with light and love.❤️
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Looking For Something?

valuethislife

valuethislife
Have you ever procrastinated about doing something Have you ever procrastinated about doing something, with thoughts of dread and overwhelm?😬And then done the thing,  finding that it was easier and faster to get done than you thought it would be?🥴Yeah, me too. Note to self: The dreading and putting off costs a whole lot more emotional energy than just doing the thing. 😊
In our busy ordinary lives there is a tendency to In our busy ordinary lives there is a tendency to get by with the barebones of running the household—but we skip the joy, comfort and encouragement part.   We trade an artful arrangement of beautiful things on the coffee table for a stack of newspapers and mail. The TV takes the place of a board game. Irritation with our family flavors our speech.   Sometimes this happens so slowly that we barely notice it, and then one day we realize that our home life is out of sorts.  With that realization comes the choice to fix those little things. Tidy up the clutter, get the laundry caught up, read aloud to children, and set a pretty table for an ordinary supper.  Look around your home with fresh eyes to see if it needs a reset. Even 20 minutes of tidying can make an amazing difference.❤️
Unexpected October ice storm in Oklahoma. Power ha Unexpected October ice storm in Oklahoma. Power has been out for 2+ days, grateful for a generator and hot water. I figured out that complaining doesn’t make electricity come back on. 😊
Always wanted a “mother’s ring” with birthst Always wanted a “mother’s ring” with birthstones of our children but we never found a design with 12 stones. 💍 It was a forgotten wish until I received this bracelet as a sweet gift. I can rattle off their birthdates like a boss but sometimes the size of our family still surprises me. It grew one baby at a time and I grew along with them, like all mothers do. There’s no rewind button, and we can’t go back and have a do-over. But we can be grateful during EVERY season for what we have, and I am!❤️
“They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their “They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength.” Not “they that complaineth much” or “they that talk about their issues all day long.” I’m guessing that “not waiting” means sucking the life out of strength instead of renewing it. But waiting can begin in this very moment. 
•
(pic from my kitchen window)😊
Sometimes it’s a struggle getting started on a t Sometimes it’s a struggle getting started on a task, but we all love how it feels when the task is done. Maybe it would help to think about how good the result will feel before we start!
Yeah, I had to run to the store to get eggs before Yeah, I had to run to the store to get eggs before 14yo could mix up cookie dough. 
👉🏻Note to self:
Don’t wait until it’s time to do a task to check whether you have what you need to do it. Realizing you’re short on supplies or information at the last minute costs time and causes stress! Knowing that you’re prepared eases the pain of getting started. Put “check for ingredients” on your to-do list!
How much life do we waste worrying and fretting an How much life do we waste worrying and fretting and dreading....when the thing we’re upset about IS GOING TO GET DONE?! It’s going to happen, it’s all going to work out, and we probably won’t even remember it by next week. Sometimes it helps to remember that!💕
We bought a house built in the 80’s and have bee We bought a house built in the 80’s and have been doing that fixer upper thing. Sorry for the blurry “before” but just think “black hole” and you’ll get the idea.😂 Amazing what paint and decor can do for a space. Sold the old mantel on FB Marketplace for $60 and bought the unfinished new one for $45. Found the print in my garage, lol. Mirror from Hobby Lobby. Sorta reminds me of my life pre-Jesus. Dark to light. Old to new. Same basic human, transformed with light and love.❤️
Follow on Instagram
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