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Value This Life

Value This Life

Helping you find more joy & beauty in everyday life

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How to Stop Feeling Busy All the Time

Being busy is almost a badge of honor these days. It’s fashionable to complain about it on social media, and talk about it with a loud sigh while standing in line with a friend. Believe me, I was skilled in blaming lots of stress on being busy. But after many years of wearing the “busy badge,” I’ve been working on how to stop feeling busy all the time.

I finally realized that the thought of “I’m so busy” is not serving me. Busyness is just a feeling, and it’s created by sentences in our mind. I love that word: sentences. It strips away the power of those feelings and exposes it for what it is: sentences we are telling ourselves. We can use the sentences to justify lack of self-care, being late, procrastination, and all manner of undesirable behavior. Maybe part of it is competition in our mind with other people: “I’m busier than them.”

The thing is, we are responsible for our thoughts and emotions. We are choosing to feel busy.

Thoughts + Feelings = State of Mind.

Yes, there’s a lot to do and many of us have numerous responsibilities. I’m not denying that there are hard circumstances and heavy loads. But here’s the first step in how to stop feeling busy all the time:

Stop telling yourself

I had to stop telling myself “I’m so busy.”

Telling myself those sentences and making them my story just made me feel overwhelmed and stressed. It kept me focused on “I can’t” and “this is too hard.”

The truth is….I have plenty of time to get everything done….that matters.

Become aware of those words “I’m so busy” and replace them with “I have plenty of time to get everything done that matters.” Try that on for size–how does it feel? You might feel stress drain away, and you just might feel a little silly for having gotten so overwhelmed.

REplace words

Here’s another tip for the sentences in your brain: Replace “I HAVE to do” with:

“I’m excited to do”

or

“I get to do”

or

“I WANT to do.”

Think about doing the things you do because it matters. Because you want to be the kind of person who does those things. It’s just what you do, because it’s who you are.

Newsflash: you don’t necessarily have to LIKE everything you do that matters. It’s a great opportunity to build character and work ethic.

Re-Think Your List

Re-think “the stuff I gotta do.” Write a list of all you do, then think about what REALLY matters. How much time do you spend doing things that don’t matter? Reclaim a portion of that time for what does matter. Start by taking a look at the screen time spent on your mobile devices. Stunning, isn’t it? What could you get done if you cut that screen time in half?

Remind yourself: “I am creating this stress and overwhelm by my thoughts. I can choose different thoughts.” We can choose to feel busy and stressed and overwhelmed….or not. Thoughts create feelings, so go backwards and change the thoughts.

Let’s admit that sometimes we want to wallow in self-pity and have a good overwhelm. Maybe deep down we hope someone will rescue us or justify our meltdown. Is that really who we want to be?

Do you want to be a peaceful person with moments of frustration or a frustrated person with peaceful moments?

I choose to reclaim my agenda and my time, and to do things because they matter. I choose more solid boundaries around how I spend my time, and a solid awareness of my thoughts. Life will never be perfect, but I choose to be a peaceful person with fleeting moments of frustration.

Lest you think I’m amazing, let me tell you that I work on this every day. It’s a constant retraining of my thinking but it’s getting there. And when I’m not there, I forgive myself. And then forgive myself when I don’t forgive myself!

Who’s with me? Let’s stop feeling busy all the time!

 

 

About Charlotte

I'm a grateful wife & mom of 12 amazing persons. I love to inspire & teach busy women to find beauty in everyday life by caring for themselves, creating comfortable homes with their families and living out ordinary days with grace and gratitude. I'd love to encourage YOU!

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Kari H. says

    October 18, 2019 at 6:12 pm

    Oh my goodness, what a WONDERFUL post! Thank you from the bottom of my heart, this is a game-changer for me.

    Reply

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I'm a grateful wife & mom of 12 amazing persons. I love to inspire & teach busy women to find beauty in everyday life by caring for themselves, creating comfortable homes with their families and living out ordinary days with grace and gratitude. I'd love to encourage YOU! Read More…

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valuethislife

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Celebrate all the things!! Our daughter got a spot Celebrate all the things!! Our daughter got a spot in cosmetology school so we threw a family beauty-themed party. Not one homemade decoration or treat, nothing fancy or overwhelming!  We just gathered stuff around the house for the theme and bought inexpensive party trimmings. Frozen cream puffs, mini cookies and candy (Easter colors were perfect), and “Bugles” for “nail tips.”  Done! Better a simple party with fun than a fancy party with stress!
I think it’s natural for us to want to feel beau I think it’s natural for us to want to feel beautiful. Why should we be embarrassed to admit that? Spring flowers, Fall leaves, Winter snowflakes and Summer sunsets are all beautiful. Different colors, textures and sizes—but each exquisite. What could change if you looked in the mirror with LOVE and appreciation for YOUR one-of-a-kind beauty?💕
The top of a tall bedroom dresser is a great spot The top of a tall bedroom dresser is a great spot for a seasonal arrangement. Tiny red berries and antique gold branches were added for Christmas. Orange bittersweet stems and scattered leaves could give it a Fall feel. A pretty arrangement helps keep the dresser top from getting cluttered with mail and coins and papers. Your bedroom is the first and last thing you see every day, so give yourself a visual treat—something that YOU enjoy seeing.🌷
Our family favorite No-Bake Cookies made special f Our family favorite No-Bake Cookies made special for Easter! Mini Robin Eggs turn the cookies into tiny nests. Recipe for the cookies and Resurrection Rolls over at the blog!
Easter week and we need all the energy and happy b Easter week and we need all the energy and happy brain we can get! Thicker hair and strong nails are kinda nice, too. Quick and simple is my mom jam, so mixing it all together works great. Some “plant stuff” tastes like grass clippings, this isn’t that. 😂 I can help you choose, let’s chat!
Sure, thoughts pop into your head but you don’t Sure, thoughts pop into your head but you don’t have to pull up a chair and turn on a movie for them. Don’t let them hang around long enough to bring you down and shape your emotions. Show them the door and turn your attention to thoughts that serve you well. Think on THOSE things. 💕
My favorite thing about our 80’s house: big wind My favorite thing about our 80’s house: big windows, almost ceiling to floor. Give me all the light! Favorite thing about photo filters: they camouflage dirty windows. **cat unintentionally included in scene, literally came out of nowhere 😳
“Older women shouldn’t wear colorful or sparkl “Older women shouldn’t wear colorful or sparkly eyeshadow.” Fashion advice I’m NOT listening to.💋Eyeshadow is the most FUN part of makeup for me, and I love variety! Many women prefer neutral/natural/no-makeup looks. Y’all go ahead! You do you! I’ll be over here with the purples and blues and greens and alllll the shimmers.😂💄What’s YOUR makeup look?
I don’t remember how it started, but decorating I don’t remember how it started, but decorating for the seasons has been part of the rhythm of our family life for years. I was determined to create a home where good memories could be made. Small holidays and seasonal touches mark the passage of time and anchor traditions. Sometimes the decor is very simple, sometimes more elaborate—but I’m always glad I made the effort!
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valuethislife

valuethislife
Celebrate all the things!! Our daughter got a spot Celebrate all the things!! Our daughter got a spot in cosmetology school so we threw a family beauty-themed party. Not one homemade decoration or treat, nothing fancy or overwhelming!  We just gathered stuff around the house for the theme and bought inexpensive party trimmings. Frozen cream puffs, mini cookies and candy (Easter colors were perfect), and “Bugles” for “nail tips.”  Done! Better a simple party with fun than a fancy party with stress!
I think it’s natural for us to want to feel beau I think it’s natural for us to want to feel beautiful. Why should we be embarrassed to admit that? Spring flowers, Fall leaves, Winter snowflakes and Summer sunsets are all beautiful. Different colors, textures and sizes—but each exquisite. What could change if you looked in the mirror with LOVE and appreciation for YOUR one-of-a-kind beauty?💕
The top of a tall bedroom dresser is a great spot The top of a tall bedroom dresser is a great spot for a seasonal arrangement. Tiny red berries and antique gold branches were added for Christmas. Orange bittersweet stems and scattered leaves could give it a Fall feel. A pretty arrangement helps keep the dresser top from getting cluttered with mail and coins and papers. Your bedroom is the first and last thing you see every day, so give yourself a visual treat—something that YOU enjoy seeing.🌷
Our family favorite No-Bake Cookies made special f Our family favorite No-Bake Cookies made special for Easter! Mini Robin Eggs turn the cookies into tiny nests. Recipe for the cookies and Resurrection Rolls over at the blog!
Easter week and we need all the energy and happy b Easter week and we need all the energy and happy brain we can get! Thicker hair and strong nails are kinda nice, too. Quick and simple is my mom jam, so mixing it all together works great. Some “plant stuff” tastes like grass clippings, this isn’t that. 😂 I can help you choose, let’s chat!
Sure, thoughts pop into your head but you don’t Sure, thoughts pop into your head but you don’t have to pull up a chair and turn on a movie for them. Don’t let them hang around long enough to bring you down and shape your emotions. Show them the door and turn your attention to thoughts that serve you well. Think on THOSE things. 💕
My favorite thing about our 80’s house: big wind My favorite thing about our 80’s house: big windows, almost ceiling to floor. Give me all the light! Favorite thing about photo filters: they camouflage dirty windows. **cat unintentionally included in scene, literally came out of nowhere 😳
“Older women shouldn’t wear colorful or sparkl “Older women shouldn’t wear colorful or sparkly eyeshadow.” Fashion advice I’m NOT listening to.💋Eyeshadow is the most FUN part of makeup for me, and I love variety! Many women prefer neutral/natural/no-makeup looks. Y’all go ahead! You do you! I’ll be over here with the purples and blues and greens and alllll the shimmers.😂💄What’s YOUR makeup look?
I don’t remember how it started, but decorating I don’t remember how it started, but decorating for the seasons has been part of the rhythm of our family life for years. I was determined to create a home where good memories could be made. Small holidays and seasonal touches mark the passage of time and anchor traditions. Sometimes the decor is very simple, sometimes more elaborate—but I’m always glad I made the effort!
Follow on Instagram
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