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Value This Life

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Quick Fix for an Overwhelmed Mom

overwhelmed-mom-busy-desktop

Post updated September 12, 2018

Overwhelm has been defined as “too much emotional going on,” and that’s certainly how it feels for an overwhelmed mom. I ought to know, because I’ve lived it far too often. As moms we have plenty going on, but pile on the emotional “too much” and it’s a recipe for stress and a meltdown. There are plenty of shifts you can make in your life to help with stress, but an overwhelmed mom needs a quick fix NOW!

One of the great lessons of my 50’s has been to stop bringing in the stress and to-do’s of tomorrow and next week and next summer into today, because then I miss today. Over the past few months I’ve found something that acts as a quick fix for overwhelm. I’ve used this tool for a while and it works so well I want to tell you about it.

The Swirling Thoughts of an Overwhelmed Mom

Part of overwhelm is swirling thoughts and sweeping generalizations. What’s a sweeping generalization, you ask? Thoughts and words like “I always” and “You never” and “Nobody ever.” Those sweeping general statements are NOT  true but we believe the story when we tell it to ourselves. Thought of always and never press in upon us, adding a heavy–but false–weight to our already spinning minds.

The other part of overwhelm is the real press of responsibilities and tasks. Yes, there is a lot to do. We’re not trying to deny the reality of your world. But often it’s not so much the tasks, it’s how we think about all of it.

So what’s a good way to stop overwhelm in its tracks before it progresses to a meltdown?

Quick Fix for an Overwhelmed Mom

Try this: When you feel the stress rising and the panic ensuing, get out some paper (hopefully your journal). But don’t necessarily write about all that’s going on. I have old journals from my young mom years, and they’re full of complaints and self-pity. Not sure that helped much, except to reinforce the despair. No, don’t write your emotions at this moment.

Instead, write your gratitude.

Make a simple list of things you’re grateful for. 

For scientific reasons (and I don’t know what they are), use white paper and a blue pen. I do think it’s best to put pen to paper, but in a pinch use a gratitude journal app on your phone.

Writing your gratitude will shift your focus from “what a big mess” to “what a great God.”

It will help put things in perspective and equip you to deal with what’s at hand, because you won’t be blowing it all out of proportion anymore. We get in trouble when we start focusing on the problems and the what-if’s….and we’re not thinking “what if it all works out,” believe me.

If you know someone who is successful, it’s because they’re NOT watering and fertilizing their fears and anxieties.

Why We Get Overwhelmed

And in the end, that’s really what overwhelm is:  fear that we’re not enough, fear that we can’t do it all, fear that it’s not going to work out, fear that there isn’t enough “us” to go around.

Try this quick fix for overwhelm and see if it helps. It’s best to catch the overwhelm at 1 or 2 on a scale of 10. If you let it go till it’s an 8, it’s going to take tears and a bubble bath to get back on track. We may not have control over the toxic thoughts that pop into our heads, but we DO have control over how long we think them and the importance we assign to them.

Focus on what you’re grateful for, write it down and feel the stress dissolve. If you’re driving or otherwise unable to write, think and speak your gratitude out loud.

I’ve tested this method for not only small daily stresses, but also for times when I’ve been in a season of heartbreak or heavy anxiety about a family situation. I found that gratitude turned naturally into prayer, instead of toxic thoughts spiraling out of control into anguish.

So if you’re an overwhelmed mom…or child…or aunt…or person…try gratitude as a quick fix, then make it a way of life.

You Might Also Like:

  • How to Stop Feeling Busy All the TimeHow to Stop Feeling Busy All the Time
  • When You Want to Be An Organized MomWhen You Want to Be An Organized Mom
  • 5 Things I Wish I’d Known as a Young Mom5 Things I Wish I’d Known as a Young Mom
  • Three Minutes Can Change Your DayThree Minutes Can Change Your Day

About Charlotte

I'm a grateful wife & mom of 12 amazing persons. I love to inspire & teach busy women to find beauty in everyday life by caring for themselves, creating comfortable homes with their families and living out ordinary days with grace and gratitude. I'd love to encourage YOU!

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Kayla says

    January 16, 2015 at 6:58 am

    Thanks Charlotte! Having had a big meltdown last week over homeschooling overwhelm, I really appreciate this advice. Exactly what I need. I’ve kept a gratitude journal in they past, but haven’t kept it up and I’ve been having struggles with becoming overwhelmed on a regular basis. Time to get back to it. I know it works.

    Reply
    • Charlotte Siems says

      January 16, 2015 at 8:19 pm

      I think we all need a reminder from time to time! Glad it was good timing for you…

      Reply
  2. Sharon says

    January 16, 2015 at 10:01 am

    I had been thinking about gratitude for a while and t-tapp, too. I am doing the t-tapp 60-day challenge un-officially but with total dedication. This is just what I needed to hear. I enjoy reading your emails and website because you’re so thoughtful and heartfelt. Your name is going on white paper with blue pen.

    Reply
    • Charlotte Siems says

      January 16, 2015 at 8:19 pm

      Aww–what a nice thought, to make it into your gratitude journal!

      Reply
  3. Devon says

    January 16, 2015 at 11:15 am

    You’re great! Thanks for the excellent reminder! I get so many emails each day but I always read yours because they are truly inspiring. God bless you and yours.

    Reply
    • Charlotte Siems says

      January 16, 2015 at 8:20 pm

      I really appreciate that, Devon!!

      Reply
  4. Gayle says

    January 16, 2015 at 11:53 pm

    I can certainly “Amen” this! This last Christmas made it to an “11” on the scale… not only did I lose it, but my sweet son-in-law tied into me, which has never ever happened before. Agonizing over it later, I realized I had not written in my journal for quite a long time. And I had slipped back into the habit of mentally complaining about all the things that people (including “God”) expected me to do.

    On the other hand, when my son passed away a couple of years ago, I was in the habit of writing daily gratitude lists. So automatically, that is what I did– looked for things to be grateful for, even in such sorrow. And there was much to thank God for. There always is.

    Since Christmas, I have been grateful to realize how He has been there to pick me up from my dumps, encourage me to press on, and help me know that there is “no pit so deep that His love is not deeper still.” (Corrie ten Boom) And that “Yes, I can!” do all things through Him who strengthens me. 🙂

    Reply
    • Charlotte Siems says

      January 21, 2015 at 7:05 pm

      Gayle, you’ve been through so much. I hope that focusing on gratitude will lift your spirits and encourage you. {{Hugs}}

      Reply
  5. Lisa says

    September 13, 2018 at 7:51 am

    This was perfect for me today!!! My daughter is getting married in Rock Hill, SC a week from Saturday. On top of all the last minute wedding craziness, we are now concerned about hurricane Florence! Thanks for this reminder to focus on what I am grateful for!

    Reply
  6. Laura Halbur says

    September 13, 2018 at 1:51 pm

    Thanks for the reminder, Charlotte! Last fall I attended a Healing Event in which the biggest take away was that God inhabits the praises of His people. Sing praise to God, even if you “just” read the Psalms. Journaling a gratitude list really helped when I had a miscarriage at the age of 46 in 2017. Blessed be the name of the Lord!

    Reply

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I'm a grateful wife & mom of 12 amazing persons. I love to inspire & teach busy women to find beauty in everyday life by caring for themselves, creating comfortable homes with their families and living out ordinary days with grace and gratitude. I'd love to encourage YOU! Read More…

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valuethislife

valuethislife
Have you ever procrastinated about doing something Have you ever procrastinated about doing something, with thoughts of dread and overwhelm?😬And then done the thing,  finding that it was easier and faster to get done than you thought it would be?🥴Yeah, me too. Note to self: The dreading and putting off costs a whole lot more emotional energy than just doing the thing. 😊
In our busy ordinary lives there is a tendency to In our busy ordinary lives there is a tendency to get by with the barebones of running the household—but we skip the joy, comfort and encouragement part.   We trade an artful arrangement of beautiful things on the coffee table for a stack of newspapers and mail. The TV takes the place of a board game. Irritation with our family flavors our speech.   Sometimes this happens so slowly that we barely notice it, and then one day we realize that our home life is out of sorts.  With that realization comes the choice to fix those little things. Tidy up the clutter, get the laundry caught up, read aloud to children, and set a pretty table for an ordinary supper.  Look around your home with fresh eyes to see if it needs a reset. Even 20 minutes of tidying can make an amazing difference.❤️
Unexpected October ice storm in Oklahoma. Power ha Unexpected October ice storm in Oklahoma. Power has been out for 2+ days, grateful for a generator and hot water. I figured out that complaining doesn’t make electricity come back on. 😊
Always wanted a “mother’s ring” with birthst Always wanted a “mother’s ring” with birthstones of our children but we never found a design with 12 stones. 💍 It was a forgotten wish until I received this bracelet as a sweet gift. I can rattle off their birthdates like a boss but sometimes the size of our family still surprises me. It grew one baby at a time and I grew along with them, like all mothers do. There’s no rewind button, and we can’t go back and have a do-over. But we can be grateful during EVERY season for what we have, and I am!❤️
“They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their “They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength.” Not “they that complaineth much” or “they that talk about their issues all day long.” I’m guessing that “not waiting” means sucking the life out of strength instead of renewing it. But waiting can begin in this very moment. 
•
(pic from my kitchen window)😊
Sometimes it’s a struggle getting started on a t Sometimes it’s a struggle getting started on a task, but we all love how it feels when the task is done. Maybe it would help to think about how good the result will feel before we start!
Yeah, I had to run to the store to get eggs before Yeah, I had to run to the store to get eggs before 14yo could mix up cookie dough. 
👉🏻Note to self:
Don’t wait until it’s time to do a task to check whether you have what you need to do it. Realizing you’re short on supplies or information at the last minute costs time and causes stress! Knowing that you’re prepared eases the pain of getting started. Put “check for ingredients” on your to-do list!
How much life do we waste worrying and fretting an How much life do we waste worrying and fretting and dreading....when the thing we’re upset about IS GOING TO GET DONE?! It’s going to happen, it’s all going to work out, and we probably won’t even remember it by next week. Sometimes it helps to remember that!💕
We bought a house built in the 80’s and have bee We bought a house built in the 80’s and have been doing that fixer upper thing. Sorry for the blurry “before” but just think “black hole” and you’ll get the idea.😂 Amazing what paint and decor can do for a space. Sold the old mantel on FB Marketplace for $60 and bought the unfinished new one for $45. Found the print in my garage, lol. Mirror from Hobby Lobby. Sorta reminds me of my life pre-Jesus. Dark to light. Old to new. Same basic human, transformed with light and love.❤️
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Looking For Something?

valuethislife

valuethislife
Have you ever procrastinated about doing something Have you ever procrastinated about doing something, with thoughts of dread and overwhelm?😬And then done the thing,  finding that it was easier and faster to get done than you thought it would be?🥴Yeah, me too. Note to self: The dreading and putting off costs a whole lot more emotional energy than just doing the thing. 😊
In our busy ordinary lives there is a tendency to In our busy ordinary lives there is a tendency to get by with the barebones of running the household—but we skip the joy, comfort and encouragement part.   We trade an artful arrangement of beautiful things on the coffee table for a stack of newspapers and mail. The TV takes the place of a board game. Irritation with our family flavors our speech.   Sometimes this happens so slowly that we barely notice it, and then one day we realize that our home life is out of sorts.  With that realization comes the choice to fix those little things. Tidy up the clutter, get the laundry caught up, read aloud to children, and set a pretty table for an ordinary supper.  Look around your home with fresh eyes to see if it needs a reset. Even 20 minutes of tidying can make an amazing difference.❤️
Unexpected October ice storm in Oklahoma. Power ha Unexpected October ice storm in Oklahoma. Power has been out for 2+ days, grateful for a generator and hot water. I figured out that complaining doesn’t make electricity come back on. 😊
Always wanted a “mother’s ring” with birthst Always wanted a “mother’s ring” with birthstones of our children but we never found a design with 12 stones. 💍 It was a forgotten wish until I received this bracelet as a sweet gift. I can rattle off their birthdates like a boss but sometimes the size of our family still surprises me. It grew one baby at a time and I grew along with them, like all mothers do. There’s no rewind button, and we can’t go back and have a do-over. But we can be grateful during EVERY season for what we have, and I am!❤️
“They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their “They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength.” Not “they that complaineth much” or “they that talk about their issues all day long.” I’m guessing that “not waiting” means sucking the life out of strength instead of renewing it. But waiting can begin in this very moment. 
•
(pic from my kitchen window)😊
Sometimes it’s a struggle getting started on a t Sometimes it’s a struggle getting started on a task, but we all love how it feels when the task is done. Maybe it would help to think about how good the result will feel before we start!
Yeah, I had to run to the store to get eggs before Yeah, I had to run to the store to get eggs before 14yo could mix up cookie dough. 
👉🏻Note to self:
Don’t wait until it’s time to do a task to check whether you have what you need to do it. Realizing you’re short on supplies or information at the last minute costs time and causes stress! Knowing that you’re prepared eases the pain of getting started. Put “check for ingredients” on your to-do list!
How much life do we waste worrying and fretting an How much life do we waste worrying and fretting and dreading....when the thing we’re upset about IS GOING TO GET DONE?! It’s going to happen, it’s all going to work out, and we probably won’t even remember it by next week. Sometimes it helps to remember that!💕
We bought a house built in the 80’s and have bee We bought a house built in the 80’s and have been doing that fixer upper thing. Sorry for the blurry “before” but just think “black hole” and you’ll get the idea.😂 Amazing what paint and decor can do for a space. Sold the old mantel on FB Marketplace for $60 and bought the unfinished new one for $45. Found the print in my garage, lol. Mirror from Hobby Lobby. Sorta reminds me of my life pre-Jesus. Dark to light. Old to new. Same basic human, transformed with light and love.❤️
Follow on Instagram
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